Goodbye Love !

“There is a thin line between a moment of clarity and moment of weakness – though one seems infinitely longer. Although I was strong all weak, and by strong I mean staying productive, keeping a smile on my face, being hopeful for the future, my strength began to dwindle. I collapsed and drowned in my sorrow. The I-can’t-breathe-i-feel-lightheaded-gasping-am-i-going-to-die kind of cry overcame me. It came to me. It’s over.

I’m tired of people telling me that I’m strong, that I’ll be okay, and that everything happens for a reason. I know that already. But right now, I am not strong, I am not okay and I don't know why this had to happen to me. I don’t care about the future especially when all I’m concerned about is how I am going to get through tonight.

A few loving conversations, and moments alone has taken me from my moment of weakness to moment of clarity. Clarity and acceptance. This chapter of my life is over.

I’m saying goodbye at the time I love you the most. I want to continue my journey ‘with you’ but a part of me says that I had enough of these assumptions. I tried to open my mind and my heart and I realized I can never force you. I can never asked for something that should and supposed to be given wholeheartedly. I can never ask for your love and everything that comes with it.

No, this is not last-minute hopeless move to get your pity. I’m wishing you could keep me as a memory of someone, a girl who once went head over heels in love with you.

Thank you for the beautiful days.”